Better day today......

Hi Guys,

So today was a bit of a better day today. I woke up feeling pretty low. I was concerned still over the work situation and other stuff that was playing on my mind. I got into a bit of a state early on in the morning. The company that is working with my employer regarding my claim had sent the forms and they wanted me to give access to literally every facet of my life including my credit history. I had gotten myself into a complete tizzy over this....I felt violated and like my privacy was being invaded. My old headmaster told my parents on my leaving school that i would make a great politician or  activist as I have always wanted to fight whats not right I am well known to friends for being the one to right angry letters at the unjust of certain situations. After what had happened with my workplace over my leave I felt like digging my heals in and fighting for my privacy. However, my amazing partner Dave is always my voice of reason, he asked me to pick my battles carefully he said who gave a flying fuck whether this company decided that I shouldn't get paid because we hadnt banked on that anyways and it was worth sending them in to see. After I had gotten into tears over it he suggested I call and speak to them. I did and was relieved. The women was very nice and explained the process, she said that they worked on lots of different things and that the authorization was generic and that they would not need to go into so much private stuff. she also said that none of my medical history would be passed back to my employer, only an opinion on whether my time off was warranted and whether they should pay me. she also told me that the evaluation takes just 3 days! this was a huge relief that by Tuesday I would have an answer one way or the other as it has been playing on my mind quite a bit. 

So after I got off the phone I was ordered by Dave to take a bath. He always seems to know the right thing to say or do to calm me down. he really is my rock! We have been through some rocky roads that have only made us stronger and together i feel like we can accomplish anything. Its been a real transition getting used to being at home together all the time. We are both quite introverted yet sensitive so we have both been quiet and then paranoid this week that we have upset the other LOL we have been walking on quite the eggshells and I think having a chat about stuff this morning broke the ice a little. 

This journey is definitely NOT what I imagined and it much harder that I anticipated. Frankly today I just thought it might be easier to go back to work!

However, the bath and a chat with a good friend who is a fellow anxiety sufferer made me feel much better. I love taking a bath it feels so relaxing. I make an awesome bath soup as i call it with the following ingredients:

• 2 cups Epsom Salts (to relax your muscles)
• 1/2 cup Baking Soda (to make your skin soft)
• 1/2 cup white vinegar (to neutralize your bits and pieces downstairs)

A good friend told me that recipe years ago and it has been a bath staple ever since, a long soak in it with a facepack and some relaxation music chilled me right the eff out! 

After the bath I decided to do some baking which always makes me feel good. I made some delicious banana chocolate bread with some bananas that were going bad. It looks delicious.

I have been using the same recipe for years i just add some chocolate chips into the mix and sprinkle some walnuts on top before i put it into the oven.

Here is the recipe:

http://www.simplyrecipes.com/recipes/banana_bread/

I then got some admin stuff done, sent off the insurance forms and I finally feel a little better. As some of the burden stuff is coming off of my shoulders I feel a little better about just chillin. 

I cant believe that the first week has gone by so fast. the days just seem to fly by!