Letting Go

Day 3 of my sabbatical was interesting......

I woke up and was feeling really tired and lazy. I have not heard back from work after my email. It leaves me in quite a bit of limbo. However, I have said my piece now and now i intend to just get on with my time off and my objectives. The guilt and anxiety of my schedule that i felt that i wasn't sticking to was getting to me. I have a habit of making these schedules and then i get really anxious and overwhelmed that i am not getting to all of the tasks on the list. 

I feel like i was getting overwhelmed again from the schedule that I made on Sunday. I started something new recently where I set myself 5 really easy tasks and if i achieved just 3 of them then i would be OK and wouldn't have to feel overwhelmed or guilty. this actually really worked for me and im still doing those tasks now without even writing them down. they have become habits.So i have decided to  take my sabbatical in the same sense, because chilling out and learning to let that anxiety go is key. My other half also told me that i need to chill, its only day 3 in and its early days on learning to adapt to my new schedule and surroundings.

So today i took it easy for the morning. I then decided that part of feeling better was looking better. For the longest time I have really let my appearance go. So i got a nice shower and did my hair and makeup. I felt so much better. it felt good to feel good LOL.

Me looking pretty

So this afternoon we just chilled, did some laundry, and I read some cookery books. cooking makes me happy and reading the huge collections of cookery books Ive amassed gives me lots of ideas. I plan on trying to make some cheese and onion bread later on this week....YUM!

I also chilled a lot of the couch with my kitty Bee Nanigans. She is such a cuddle bug and always seems to know when i need a little TLC.  she gets right up in my grill and we have a proper little cuddle.

it felt nice to just chill, to let myself be, no schedule, no tasks just be......without guilt and anxiety. So i think a new approach needs to be taken. I cant go gun-ho into a brand new schedule it is only going to hinder my progress. I think that i need to gently ease myself into this sabatical with maybe the small tasks approach and also doing things that make me happy like baking and sewing. 

Im really excited about starting therapy so that i can start my CBT.

Anyways i am off for more snuggles with my Bee Nanigans and my wonderful, supportive, loving, caring Man......whom I love with all my heart but more about him another time........